He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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