Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
She needs sedatives and a leash
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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