school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize