Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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