This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
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Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
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The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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