So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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