do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
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i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
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Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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