Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize