oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
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I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
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Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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