They have a pepper shaker for pot.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
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