i think i have herpe
just one?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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