Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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