That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize