brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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