Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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