i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize