heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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