Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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