sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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