We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize