Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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