If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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