it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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