I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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