Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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