hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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