First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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