I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize