they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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