I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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