if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize