The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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