That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize