I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
My penis needs a shock collar
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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