We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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