Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize