Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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