Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize