my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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