I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
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