The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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