Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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