omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Congratulations! We have a period
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize