I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize