this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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