Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize