If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize