I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize