??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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