Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize